God I wish my brothers didn’t live back at home in The Netherlands and me here with my parents in the US,
today I gmail video chatted with him and it sometimes makes me realize how much I miss them, and also how many times I actually confide in them. The are practically my emotional armor. But now I don’t have that anymore, and it makes me feel lonely when I’m at home, that’s why I always wanna get out of the house. But then the people around me start annoying the crap out of me, so I get cranky.
I don’t know, I’m just so disoriented without my brothers. It makes you feel like you’ve lost something and you’re always unconsciously looking for it.